firsts

Yesterday I kayaked the Ocoee for the first time. It's a pretty big river, class 3's and 4's. I'm not quite sure i was totally prepared to kayak those classes, but I thought I should step up my game and push myself, so I went for it! Two good friends here took me down and guided me through each rapid (I generally avoided the class 4's by taking sneak routes, i need to get a bit better before i hit it full on). I have to say, it started with a bang! I swam (came out of my boat) the very first rapid-which was a doozy by the way--lost my paddle--but finally swam to the side with my boat. I was shaking all over! It was definitely the biggest class swim I've ever done. I didn't get cut up too badly, but I got some minor cuts and bruises; feeling it today for sure! After that I was pretty nervous. My friend Tyler gave me his paddle to use (you're awesome dude!) and he found a normal raft paddle (yes, one sided), and did the whole rest of the river that way! My adrenaline was still pumping pretty good as I ran the rest of the river--biggest waves I've ever paddled through--but it was fantastic! Super, SUPER fun. So--my day of firsts went like this:

--First swim in a class 3+ rapid
--First time losing a paddle
--First time paddling a class 3+ river
--First surf and consequential combat roll in big water
--First time FINDING my paddle (a nice raft guide returned it at the end of the day)
--First time hitchhiking (had to get back to the car park up river)

As I was riding in the back of that truck on the way to the put-in at the top, I couldn't stop smiling! It was such a fantastic day, and I KNOW I will paddle it again--though I may walk past Grumpy's (the first rapid) to start for quite a while. WUHOO! It was awesome.

summer

In the summers I get to live a slightly different life. My friends may or may not believe there is a God, there is no social acceptability except that you are true to yourself and love people, and I don't get looked down upon when I curse (which, coincidentally, happens more often in the summer). Every summer I almost wish I could melt into my summer world. A world where things are simpler, raft guiding and work drama, and most of all have fun, well, that's all there is. I have made some true friends this summer--friends my heart already has a special place for--friends I won't quickly grow out of--i love them deeply even though it's only been a few months. I've been reading the book "Blue Like Jazz" for the first time this summer, and it's really meant a lot to me. But what pushed me to write this morning was a specific passage:

The real issue with Christian community was that it was conditional. You were loved, but if you had questions, questions about whether the Bible was true or whether American was a good country or whether last week's sermon was good, you were not so loved. You were loved in word, but there was, without question, a social commodity that was being withheld from you until you shaped up...If you wanted to be valued, you became a clone...There was love in the Christian community, but it was conditional love. (Blue Like Jazz pp 214-215)

Why is it that we Christians have the hardest time with that: love? TWO THINGS--that's it, just two things Jesus said were the things to live by. "LOVE the Lord your God with all your heart, and LOVE your neighbor as yourself." Last Sunday our associate pastor spoke on just that--our job is to LOVE, just love. Why can't we love lesbians, gays, republicans, democrats, and all races on earth??? I love my God, I love that HE loves me, little ol me, who's screwed up more than a few things in life. I thank Him daily that He blessed me with a wonderful guy who feels the same way about Him. But my main job, is to love like Jesus loved while he was here--eating with the unclean, loving the unlovable, and remembering that those Holier than Thou people are in that category too. Love. K--now I'm gonna go kayak the Ocoee--you should start praying now :)